Stop Watering A Dead Plant
By Babatunde Olugboji
This week, we’ll round up our conversation on friendship, still using the David-Jonathan relationship as our anchor.
Do you know that only a true friend will recognize and celebrate your elevation, just like Jonathan did? ‘You will be king over Israel, and I will be second to you. Even my father Saul knows this (1 Samuel 23: 17b).
When someone recognizes the hand of God in your life, without being envious, threatened, or intimidated by your elevation, that is a sign that he or she is indeed a good friend.
Jonathan had many reasons to envy David, because based on kingdom protocol, etiquette, procedure, decorum, code of behavior, way of doing things, practice, culture, tradition, and principles of succession, Jonathan was next in line to the throne. But he wasn’t thinking about himself, he thought: I know that God has already bypassed me and anointed you, David. I am happy as long as I can get to stand next to you when (not if) you become King.
It doesn’t mean that Jonathan lacked ambition or feel inferior, he just knew that David was the chosen one and he was happy for his friend.
Have you noticed that some people cannot handle where God is taking you? Sometimes you get to really know your true friends when God elevates you.
Be careful when people start behaving funny every time you get a raise at work, or buy a new car, or looking to put you in the shade by buying bigger things, as if you are in competition with them. If they can’t handle what God is doing in your life, maybe it is time to cut such friends off. It doesn’t matter if they accuse you of being arrogant. Not many BFFs (Best Friends Forever) will stay with you in difficult situations. Some will quit, or fail to answer your call, or walk away from you when things get tough.
Please rejoice when some so-called friends decide to walk out of your life. You may even have to pray that God will make it impossible for such people to stay. When people decide to walk, let them walk. Your destiny is never tied to the person that left. The Bible says ‘These people left our churches, but they never really belonged with us; otherwise, they would have stayed with us. When they left, it proved that they did not belong with us (1 John 2:19).
People leave you because they’re not joined to you and if they are not joined to you, you cannot make them stay. Allowing people to walk doesn’t necessarily mean that they are bad, it just means that their chapter in your story is over.
You’ve got to know when someone’s part in your story is over so that you don’t keep trying to raise the dead. Learn to know when a relationship is dead or is meant to die. Saying good-bye may not be a bad idea. It’s not that you are hateful, you are just faithful, you should know whatever God meant for you, won’t walk away.
Stop begging people to stay. You are too blessed to worry about people who love you or who don’t.
Stop watering a dead plant!
My prayer for you this week is that God will give you the wisdom to know a Jonathan from an Ahithophel.
Have a great week!
Kingdom Dynamics, a weekly column is written by Dr. Babatunde Olugboji, the President, Kingdom House, a non-profit organization in New Jersey, USA.
